STOP!!!

Stop!!! dats what life often tells me..Stop n think...think of what?? think of the next door kid who never studies n plays the whole day and how i wish mom had let me play the entire day when i was young n never study.think about the days when i spent the entire days think bogus n doing nothing..n today life says Stop n think about days when u think nothing at all...!!!life says Stop n think about the emotions that is gushing in your heart when ur best friend is leaving the city!! Stop him?call him?cry to him?or just stay silent n see what comes next.life says Stop n think of a habit u developed recently n finding it hard to chuck of. a habit which you are not proud of but still finding it difficult to get out of it.or just still idle n think of what to think!!!

People & Faces...

There is some faint connection between Monday evenings & blogging. I have often found myself scribbling words in notepad/word docs on Monday evenings when I have nothing to do n I am tired of taking breaks. While I was away for a while from my desk & taking a lonely break from the chaos of clients few faces flashed in my mind. Few of them being the people I was/ am associated because of my profession while some being those who are important in life. I was just trying to play a rapid fire game with my mind by asking it the names of people who are/was associated with me due to some special reasons. As for say I asked my mind who do u associate to when i say "Sad"..my mind promptly flashed the face of my colleague from my previous office(name not to be disclosed of various reasons)...n I and my mind suddenly liked this game. Well while I am writing this I also ask myself is this a game between my mind & heart?Maybe...dat is not important as long as my fingers get the flow for finishing this blog...

There are people in my life who has been dere for the past 16 years..n den after 16 years of so called friendship she calls me names when things don't turn out her way.Situations make me believe dat after such a long period of knowing each other there was no platform to sort things out. And there are people with whom i was not in touch for years but now when I am happy or sad i would want to call them. But its all a game of time...but only one relation where time could not play its wicked game is my friend/now roomie..she has been n always be someone whom i dont term as "best friend" but she is someone for whom i would want to give my self-less efforts if i fell she needs it. Time has not always been wicked. Time has also returned back my childhood friend from school to with whom i feel connected and today it does not take an effort to call her..it just happens. Someone whom I called 'association' became my best chatting buddy when we shared a common interest in photography..Strange is the game of time and changing mind..!! They together make a deadly combination.

When i say books the one name that i remember is Avik who has always been my best reading buddy..but it also reminds me of the guy who deliver me books from Flipkart..we both somehow remember each others face as when he comes to deliver books to others he gives me a warm smile. Everyone has somehow gave me something worth remembering.The guy with whom i shared an auto on an very wet monsoon evening on my way home from office who taught me how to convince an autowalla with sweet words. Or the chat friend whom i have never seen but has given me innumerable reasons to think about different things to write. Or my students mother who has through her own experiences taught me that You should give an ending to everything.

People whom we conventionally name "Friends" are they really friends?? And people whom we name "associations" are they really mere associations..?? They often make a remarkable change in our life unknowingly..as for someone whom i would only call an 'association' and is no more in touch with taught me how to cook my favorite dish...!!She is dere somewhere in my life even though i never mention or remember her. Strange but true..

confession

I don't remember when I sat beside him, asked him his name. He didn't tell me his name, but sang to me: "I won't be a name in your life, I would be your life."....

kemon achish??

kamon achis amay chere??
kamon achis anek dure?
cholche kamon jibon chaka??
moner kon ta lagche faka??
accha akhono bayna koris??
ager maton du chokh voris??
gaite paris sei chena gaan??
sei chena sur sei oviman??
moner kotha r diary lekha..!!
dukkho hole bristi dekha..
janis ajo amar ghore,
mushal dhare bristi pore..
sedin jakhon chole geli,
poth alada bujhie dili..
sedin theke megh koreche,
upche duchokh jol jhoreche..
amar ghore keu asena..
lekha r pase keu bose na..
tobuo ami valoi achi..
swapno nie jibon bachi..
char se katah, bol tor katha..
kamon achis, khabor ki tor..??

goodbye...

Lets laugh together till the sweet tears oozes out,
Lets cry together till we realize its nothing about,
Lets fight together till we hold our points strong and stout,
Lets laugh together till tears oozes out...

Let us write a poem to read in the solitude,
Let us sing a song to hum unknowingly,
Let us dance to our favorite tune,
Let us make love like we have never done before.

Let us do all things that defines us,
Lets us relive our love,
Lets us accept we love each other,
And let us promise each,
Once we part,
Never to look back further!!

analysis and inference...!!!

Updating formulae is not what I wanted to do all day long but that is what I am doing right now.. How bored and disgusted a little soul can be that she is blogging at 4:32pm from office that also on a Monday afternoon…well that’s how office and life is right now…suddenly it feels that nothing is in place!!! I feel it more because life was more or less perfect for few days…getting out of perfect things to a sudden trackless life is difficult!!! I don’t know what do people of my age group feels when they move out of a 5 years long relationship to a world where nothing is known but to me it’s rather shocking!!! I am shocked of the fact that I was so god damn stupid to believe that my beliefs would still work in this world…!!!
After years of struggle I actually came to believe that life is really bad and it cannot be good for me…dreams are restricted zone where I should not step into…love is a barred reality and I should stay away from it!!!
After a lot of analysis I boiled down to few very important points:
1) Do not call the person when you want to talk to him the most!!
2) If possible delete the number from your mobile(well that’s tough indeed)
3) Do not go to lunch with him.. if possible quit having lunch but do not go to lunch with him!!!
4) If you peep out of your desk and look at him to see that he is terribly hungry then do not go down to the cafeteria to get a pack of biscuits and a coffee. Do not get allured to pamper him!!!
5) If he is frustrated with work and he does not know what to do not rush ahead to pacify him!!!
6) If you go out shopping with someone and you like a dress then buy it immediately…!!! Do not wait for him to come up and confirm that the dress is good!!
7) If you want a smoke break then do not ping him, just catch hold of any one whom you see the first and run for break. If possible catch hold of that person whom u hate the most…that would also help you in quitting as well (remember you are again quitting for your beloved).
8) If you cook something great then make sure you don’t pack it for him. And if you do by mistake then make sure that you don’t get delighted when his eyes close out of pleasure of the taste of the food!!!
9) Don’t save money for gifting him the best gift in his Birthday!!!
And there are so many more things….
But as I was completing the 10th point I realized that these are things that makes me happy…shouldn’t I pursue my happiness…So at times analysis fails!!this time also analysis failed and I am happy to continue the way things are!!!

few things in life.....

Few Things In life That you never forget and happens everyday....



Few Landline numbers that I will never forget...(in few cases you would find stars as it would be unfair to reveal them in public)...



1. Sreya Tarafdar : 556 ***3...a number that i have dialed innumerable times be it from a STD booth(dere were times when there was not even a landline at home leave aside a mobile) or from a landline..she was a real good friend in school who got lost in the troubles of young heart and mind...many unfair deeds from my side and many innocent tears from her side and today i would really say sorry from the core of my heart to the pretty lady who just broke all ties from us...



2. Avik Ranjan Chatterjee : 2556 ***1 : the number from where a call with well defined conversations would turn to a blank call if ma picked the call..a number which i often used to dial after days and charge the person on the other side for not calling me for days...(well i rarely give a chance to other people to talk when i am angry)...even though i am in touch with this person over mobile but could not memorize his mobile number by heart...



3.Suman Saha : 2*** 4632 : I can hardly forget this number..now i can never coz the last four digits is now our car number...but have had long talks through this number...from blank calls to long calls to fights to little deeds of friendship...this number has given it all...how can i forget those days of shikshyatan when my only incentive to go to school was to come back home and wait for the call from this person...



4.Amrita Talukdar : 2337 ***0 : Well my "best buddy"...she has really been through real hard times..have scolded me to pampered me like a child at different times...her mobile number is also my at my fingertips but this number is yet very special!!



5.Mom's Office Number : This is the number i have dialed hundred times to get in touch with ma and then had nothing to talk about...

Few Things I look Forward to in a normal day...


1.When in Kolkata I really used to look forward to a warm cup of tea from Ma after i landed home after a tiring day...


2.My roommate with a happy face when I return much more tired in Bangalore...


3.A sudden call from an old friend with nothing new to talk...


4.A volvo bus just in time...


5.A cool Bangalore with breeze with few good news and a smile on my face....


Few Things that make me smile when i look back....


1.John Sir's coaching classes with long addas and long cycle ride with a very good friend...


2.Childish act of my friends in school which made me cry...


3.Sneha's tiffin...


4.The boiled egg in Avik's Tiffin....


5.Book fair with the person I love...


6.Sudden visit of my boyfriend(ex though) on our anniversary which eventually happened to be my last day of exam....


7."Kodak moment" as defined by Shatavisha...


8.Long bike rides with my boyfriend(ex again) on highway and a warm cup of tea on a road side dhaba....


9.Proxy in class and then getting caught....


10.Bunking class for playing TT....


11.Uninterrupted adda in Kantakol with continuous flow of cha from Basuda!!!


12.Fights with friends...


13.Saroda's accident and then going to a coffee shop with broken leg and pain in her face...


14.Rationing the most important thing in life...


15.A bouquet from some whom u hardly know and a proposal from the same person in the middle of a busy road...


16.Copying in exams and explaining things to a friend who cannot copy...


17.Sarthak da's tuition....



18.Veg Party at sarthak da's palce and debu's reaction to it....



19."Gotilla" and "swalpa adjust madi" in Bangalore



20.Mota writting Prabir Ghosh as father's name and Sutapa saha(dats my mom) as mothers name in class assignment on pocket money



21.Mota calling me "Chu" till date...



22.Jokes of Dibyo where you at times find yourself in such a situation where neither can u laugh nor can you cry...but end up laughing...



23.Suranjana and her "friends"...



24.She and her pox just during the mock test....



25.Swarnodeep and his writings....



26.Crush on my best friend...and then crying for him all nights and then making fun on it today...




And many more....